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Update from the Road

Tom Banjo

By Tom Banjo
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GoingBackTo Where.... Enthusiast

GoingBackTo Where....

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I uh....hate to agree, but I am ready for a desolation row, like three years ago, but it's the fun of the wheel....if the Thunder don't catch ya then the lightning will......if you knew how to run like lightning, than you never would of got caught:)!!!!

And of course a big happy bday hug to my big hairy B;)!!! Warm wishes on your day brother.

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Tom Banjo

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Happy Birthday brother.

 

I can relate to what you speak buddy.  I still roll my own dice with the law and my life, but I much prefer to be in control of the situation.  I am sorry I slept the whole ride home.  If the driving was as erratic as your describe, I probably would have spoke up and maybe been able to help put us both at ease.  Maybe I would've disagreed with your assessment.  Either way your assessment is very real.

 

One year at Black Mountain, I agreed to ride along in the van with everyone.  I offered to drive and sad I preferred to drive, but like usual, someone else usually gets picked to drive the spunion starship home.  I take a little offense to this to begin with, but try not to take it personally.  I don't drink at shows and by shows end, I am very good judge of whether I can or can't drive.  I learned this the hard way.  Driving when I shouldn't.  Having to call people from rest stops to pick me up.  I've done this DSO thing nearly 500 times now and have a pretty good idea about what I'm doing, but whatever don't take it personal.  Most of the time I'd rather choose to just drive myself, but here at Black Mountain, someone else driving and I'm riding.  Someone staying at our hotel is trying to hitch hike back to the hotel.  Our van is at capacity.  All seats and seat belts accounted for.  We let this guy dive in and then ride the whole way back to the hotel laying across people despite my protest.  Its funny now, but was and still is incredibly stupid behavior.  Crazy thing is.  I'd still ride with this guy again.  He's a solid driver.  

 

I much prefer to keep myself in the position of control.  

 

Hell just in Charlotte.  I once again get passed up as the driver and we take the exit ramp at at least 20 plus over the posted limit.  We hit a giant pot hole on side of road coming back into the neighborhood as we cruise that road at 15 over.  Incredibly stupid.  I'd still ride with him again too.  

 

At the end of it all, I know people could point out mistakes I've made no problem.  We all make mistakes.  We all make our own choices in keeping ourselves safe.  You got to do what feels right for you.  Being the driver usually seems to make most feel the most comfortable unless they know they are beyond a disaster.  

 

Happy Birthday.  Love you brother.  Hope you have a joyful one. 

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Dr. Barry Newbie

Dr. Barry

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Happy birthday!!!

My wish for you is a box of Cubans (cigars) that never turn into stubs!

You are another one of the awesome elders on the scene (don't take the "elder" personally, I'm right behind you!). You are so solid and just by being around you lend your love to the situation like one of those trees that quietly exclaim their depth and wisdom.

We love seeing you and being with you whenever we are lucky enough.

Love,

Barry and Sweet Annamarie

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Rude Mentor

Rude

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Happy Birthday brother.

 

I can relate to what you speak buddy.  I still roll my own dice with the law and my life, but I much prefer to be in control of the situation.  I am sorry I slept the whole ride home.  If the driving was as erratic as your describe, I probably would have spoke up and maybe been able to help put us both at ease.  Maybe I would've disagreed with your assessment.  Either way your assessment is very real.

 

One year at Black Mountain, I agreed to ride along in the van with everyone.  I offered to drive and sad I preferred to drive, but like usual, someone else usually gets picked to drive the spunion starship home.  I take a little offense to this to begin with, but try not to take it personally.  I don't drink at shows and by shows end, I am very good judge of whether I can or can't drive.  I learned this the hard way.  Driving when I shouldn't.  Having to call people from rest stops to pick me up.  I've done this DSO thing nearly 500 times now and have a pretty good idea about what I'm doing, but whatever don't take it personal.  Most of the time I'd rather choose to just drive myself, but here at Black Mountain, someone else driving and I'm riding.  Someone staying at our hotel is trying to hitch hike back to the hotel.  Our van is at capacity.  All seats and seat belts accounted for.  We let this guy dive in and then ride the whole way back to the hotel laying across people despite my protest.  Its funny now, but was and still is incredibly stupid behavior.  Crazy thing is.  I'd still ride with this guy again.  He's a solid driver.  

 

I much prefer to keep myself in the position of control.  

 

Hell just in Charlotte.  I once again get passed up as the driver and we take the exit ramp at at least 20 plus over the posted limit.  We hit a giant pot hole on side of road coming back into the neighborhood as we cruise that road at 15 over.  Incredibly stupid.  I'd still ride with him again too.  

 

At the end of it all, I know people could point out mistakes I've made no problem.  We all make mistakes.  We all make our own choices in keeping ourselves safe.  You got to do what feels right for you.  Being the driver usually seems to make most feel the most comfortable unless they know they are beyond a disaster.  

 

Happy Birthday.  Love you brother.  Hope you have a joyful one. 

 

Sage words from the king of texting and driving and slamming brakes to not hit the car in front so casual texts are not delayed.  And that country road was pitch black and impossible to see the pothole until it was on us.  Plus tons of traffic and having to take 2 consecutive exits then having no clue the exit was a 25mph as we were going 60.  I never crossed a line even though i braked harder than I would have preferred.  Next time make sure to use your powers of advance sight to let me know when an exit is a super slow circle as Im trying to navigate traffic to even get to said exit.  As a good co-pilot, I saved us from 1 for sure crash on the previous tour.  Unfortunately I didnt have a me assisting on my pitch black drive in a new city. 

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Tom Banjo Proficient

Tom Banjo

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No need to worry about a family feud.  I know we all brothers even that troll is a brother.  

 

I stated in my post that someone could easily point out my mistakes.  I've slept while rude drove.  I got no issues with his driving.  

 

I would personally never take an unknown exit ramp at over 45 MPH ever.  I knew generally where the pot hole was.  I registered it when I saw it earlier that day.  It was also close to edge of the road.  You'd have to be hugging the line to hit it.

 

I do text way too much while driving.  I am working on this practice every day. 

 

I know not to take things personally.  I also choose not to respond defensively all the time.  I do text and drive and that behavior should never be defended.  I'm a little surprised Rude defended himself instead of just saying mea culpa but then I remember it is Rude; he epitomizes the defend myself even when I know I'm wrong mentality I find so prevalent in deadheads and humans alike. Defensive responses is certainly apart of the human condition.  

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I'm also sorry if using Rude as an example offended him.  Please don't take it personally just shining to light my own desires to be in control and my own situations where not having control put me or could have put in a bad spot.  I think we can all mention tons of these situations.  

 

Hell many may start with MC just lit up a joint where?

 

I also intentionally didn't mention the drivers by name.  If Rude didn't interject, there was no need for anyone to suffer any public shame of any sorts.

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Tom Banjo

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BTW, the shift to working on texting while driving occurred on this current tour.  I had been up all night and clearly was not totally aware or hyper aware as us hippies like to be.  I cop saw me texting while driving.  He stopped me.  Wrote me a ticket.  That was the end of it, but it certainly could have been a great deal worse.  If you see me texting while driving, speak up.  I'm trying to stop it. 

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jj3down Newbie

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Texting and driving is something I am working on eliminating too.  Texting and driving is so obvious though... for some reason the multitude of other distracting functions that smartphones include never seem to make any "Don't _____ And Drive" list.

 

For me, even if I am mindful about texting, I end up trying to fuck around with music or podcast players, checking traffic on Google maps (while navigating said traffic), looking for the best price on Gas Buddy, etc, etc.  Smartphones while driving are dangerous, period.

 

The "Do Not Disturb" is a great smartphone function that I always fail to utilize.

 

And voice texting may be more dangerous than typing...

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Rude Mentor

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I got pulled over for texting and driving.  Heres how to avoid the ticket.  Instantly dial someones number.  Just hang up.  No need to actually have a real call.  Delete the text.  The cop will always say do you know why I pulled you over.  You say I was dialing a number on my phone and you guess that is against the law.  The cop will tell you that dialing a number is not illegal and it is NOT considered texting.  The cop asked to see my phone.  I showed no text had been sent in 30 minutes.  Then I showed the call log showing a call 3 minutes previous.  I apologized.  He said pull over to make a call next time.  To toot my own horn, I had never contemplated any of this before it happened.  It took me 2 minutes to think of making the call.  I was afraid when he saw the call had only been placed 3 minutes previous and he had pulled out 5 minutes before that he would call me out on it, but I got off and my insurance rates didnt shoot through the roof.

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Just a few years ago, my #1 criteria for selecting a cell phone was how dexterously I could dial a number with one hand while driving.

 

Now I can't recall the last time I actually input the individual digits of a phone number.

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Brian NJ Enthusiast

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Happy Birthday brother.

I can relate to what you speak buddy. I still roll my own dice with the law and my life, but I much prefer to be in control of the situation. I am sorry I slept the whole ride home. If the driving was as erratic as your describe, I probably would have spoke up and maybe been able to help put us both at ease. Maybe I would've disagreed with your assessment. Either way your assessment is very real.

One year at Black Mountain, I agreed to ride along in the van with everyone. I offered to drive and sad I preferred to drive, but like usual, someone else usually gets picked to drive the spunion starship home. I take a little offense to this to begin with, but try not to take it personally. I don't drink at shows and by shows end, I am very good judge of whether I can or can't drive. I learned this the hard way. Driving when I shouldn't. Having to call people from rest stops to pick me up. I've done this DSO thing nearly 500 times now and have a pretty good idea about what I'm doing, but whatever don't take it personal. Most of the time I'd rather choose to just drive myself, but here at Black Mountain, someone else driving and I'm riding. Someone staying at our hotel is trying to hitch hike back to the hotel. Our van is at capacity. All seats and seat belts accounted for. We let this guy dive in and then ride the whole way back to the hotel laying across people despite my protest. Its funny now, but was and still is incredibly stupid behavior. Crazy thing is. I'd still ride with this guy again. He's a solid driver.

I much prefer to keep myself in the position of control.

Hell just in Charlotte. I once again get passed up as the driver and we take the exit ramp at at least 20 plus over the posted limit. We hit a giant pot hole on side of road coming back into the neighborhood as we cruise that road at 15 over. Incredibly stupid. I'd still ride with him again too.

At the end of it all, I know people could point out mistakes I've made no problem. We all make mistakes. We all make our own choices in keeping ourselves safe. You got to do what feels right for you. Being the driver usually seems to make most feel the most comfortable unless they know they are beyond a disaster.

Happy Birthday. Love you brother. Hope you have a joyful one.

Ha I was in that van and have and will always trust his driving.

Forget my description, think about it, a little more than 4 hrs of driving time (not counting the hour traveling through bronx&manhattan) to go from portland to Plainsboro nj on a Monday afternoon should indicate what it was like.

Like I said, it was me that made bad choices.

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Tom Banjo Proficient

Tom Banjo

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I would hope in the future even if he's driving (he's a solid driver), we can leave the hitch hiker in the lot if the car is full.  Someone else will pick him up.  Hell I'd rather go to the hotel and get my own car and go back and get him.

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Brian NJ Enthusiast

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I know he was speeding. There's no doubt of that. He admits he was speeding. The issue is behind us. I know you won't make a choice like that again.

80Mph on deserted Utah highway was a piece of cake compared to weaving in and out of cars and trucks at 90Mph on a crowded interstate 95!!!

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Brian NJ Enthusiast

Brian NJ

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Tonight I am humbled by my ignorance to the unseen suffering of others.

Two years ago I lost a crown on a tooth. Yesterday the pain became unbearable and today I had it pulled. I was blind to how much this had affected my spirit, weighing me down slowly over time, becoming more of a burden day after day week after week... Tonight I feel free! I have a great tolerance for pain and again the words of Bob Dylan come to mind "you'll never know the pain I suffer or the hurt I rise above and I'll never know the same about you". I need to remember this experience in hope that I can cast off my intolerance and impatience towards others. I cannot see the "behind the scene" burdens of others. What I perceive in others can be a shallow view of the totality of another's experience....

Everyone has unseen burdens to varying degree, be it physical, emotional etc.

This is a great lesson for me from the other side of the adversity that life can throw at us...

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